aunt flo

A few things.

First, it has definitely been a while since my last blog. I hate falling off the bandwagon of posting because it makes it so much harder to get back to. Busy, busy life.

Secondly, I don't know why it makes me happy, but I love hearing about guys who like their girl to be laid back and low-key, not just in how they dress, etc. but also in personality. Because I watch television shows like 'The Hills' sometimes and wonder how any guy could stand being near those girls... they may be 'hot', but at what price? When grooming, and dressing, and shopping, and thinking about shoes and purses gets in the way of having a real life and maybe reading a newspaper or trying to lead an informed and intelligent conversation, i think the attraction just leaves. I really don't get it.

Besides, secretly i've always wished i was born in another century... where men were the only ones who shaved (or didn't) and their was no such thing as internet pornography. Because every man and their uncle watches porn on their computers, featuring size 0 girls with DD tits and a desire to have ejaculate all over their face... sets a standard for the normal girls that makes us all feel pressure to look and fuck like jenna jameson.

Another plus of living in another century would be the great big poofy dresses, the hugely poofed hair, and the inability to think for yourself (just kidding).

Anyway, I have been busy with work and school and i just got my monthly visit from Aunt Flo... right on time as usual and came with as much pain as the visit of a real relative.

I think I may hate my period even more than the next woman, and this is why. I have enormously painful cramps that leave me debilitated unless I completely over-dose on the painkillers. I am extremely hungry the whole week before, which leads to over-eating and bloating. I get extremely irritable, and I run hot and cold the whole week and cry at the drop of a dime. And the absolute worst part is that I am probably the most horny this week than any other week of my cycle.

I have tried to have sex on my period on many occasions (can't accuse me of not trying... I'm seriously begging for it the whole time). It's never really worked out.

First of all, I really get off on oral sex. Giving it, and receiving it. I can still go down on my man, no problem, which gets me super-wet... but I can't even think to ask him to return the favor when I'm bleeding. Even if I were cruel enough to ask him to do it, the thought of him actually CONSUMING what is in actuality the lining of my uterus.... *shudder* That's straight cannibalism.

Being unable yet to orgasm from straight sex (without oral involved), really ruins things for me during this month. Because fuck, I'm horny and I really want that orgasm.

So the sex itself... is messy. And you have to be careful of the sheets getting stained... so you have to put down some sort of barrier, like a towel or something... you know the more thought you put into this type of thing, the harder you work to get back in the mood.

We tried it in the shower.... shower was too small, the angle was awkward... didn't quite work.

Tried it on the bathroom floor with him on top and lying on a towel... worked, but was uncomfortable for him (it hurt his knees), and the lighting in there just SUCKED... as in, it was light enough in there to see the blood. NOT sexy.

Basically, after all the trouble we've gone through and experimenting we've done, we haven't quite figured out a way to make sex on the period fun... or even really just work. So for one week out of the month, we joke that my box is 'out of commission'

And the only way I can get off (and frequently do) is by just wearing a tampon and using a vibrator on my clit. Not the greatest climax in the world, but better than nothing and better than making a mess.

Has anyone else made sex work during this time??

~badlittlegoodgirl

ps, whoever said that having an orgasm makes your cramps go away was fucking wrong. remind me to pop a few pills before I do that again, and again, tomorrow.

pps, whoever said that EXERCISE made your cramps feel better wasn't just wrong, they were insane. there is nothing worse than exercising with cramps... not only does it make the pain worse but you get hot and sweaty and gross on top of it.

ppps, sometimes i have a million things to say but not enough room to write it and no way to make any kind of fluid blending of the topics, hence my somewhat scattered blog posts. sorry :)